Quit Your Jibber, Jabba

All my own work.

Eurovision 2010

Just had a top night watching this year's Eurovision Song Contest. The competition was pretty good this year - no outstanding entries, but solid, I thought. Highlights of the night were the Greeks with their mixture of butch tribalness and Belarus' beautiful butterfly costumes. It was won by the Germans, so next year's competition will take place in Germany. I haven't been back to Germany since I lived there - If it's possible to get tickets, I might seriously think about going along - it's on my list of things to do before I die. (Quite low down, though). Anyhoo, here are some pictures - only two of us went in fancy dress (well done Ruth!), I had to explain my efforts to the younger ones (I went as Uncle Bulgaria, in case you're wondering). Fortunately, nobody seems to have taken a picture of my grey furry chaps.

Learning to Cook

Yup, this pretty much sums it up.

Tiny Things...

I LOVE the new Facebook profile. It means I can do things like this...

Festive

Take a Weird Break

If you aren't already familiar with the spectacularly brilliant website Take a Weird Break, you should be. It's a very funny look at some of the more surreal headlines that appear on those true story mags. Well worth a look.

And here's one I found a few days ago. I can't remember which mag it was in and I have no idea what made her panic to such a degree. I particularly love the tagline - "what was I thinking?"

I imagine the Police knocking on the door and the woman thinking "Oh no, it's the Police! Quick! Cut my tits off!" and then slapping herself on the forehead afterwards. It's a schoolboy error, the girl's got to be disappointed with that.

If I see any more, I will post them here.

An Exmoor Adventure

Had my first adventure of the Summer in Conan, my trustee VW Transporter. I decided to have a look around the North Devon coast. And I have to say, what I discovered absolutely blew me away. Dartmoor was pretty, but Exmoor was simply spectacular. I stayed the night in Selworthy, a secret hidden road just by Minehead. Bizarrely, I drove past a man on his own, playing the bagpipes.

The next morning, I went further into Exmoor. And there were so many fantastic things to see... However, my personal favourite was the Valley of the Rocks (which is a fantastic name in itself). It is, without a doubt, the most beautiful place I've ever seen in England. And, there's a car park... where you can stay overnight for just £5 or £16 for the WHOLE week. That's where my next holiday's going to be!

Here are some photos. They do not do any of the places I've seen justice.

Reasons Not to Listen to your Mother #2156

I have a skin tag on my neck, which looks a bit like a mole and my mother has been going on at me for months to let her freeze it off. Finally, last weekend, I consented and allowed her to attempt to freeze it off. And the result is, I now still have a skin tag - it just no longer looks like a mole. Now it looks like a very small erect penis. On my neck. Thanks. for. that.

Spam is getting increasingly more surreal

I want to be a Scientist

The Dark Side of the Force

Political Lookeylikey

I give you Data Cameron, from Star Trek.

"Raise Your Left Leg... Ahaa! I didn't say Simon Says!"

I'm not saying I have a large penis. But I am implying it

Just back from a fun weekend spent with my family in Ipswich - culminating in a visit to the O2 Arena to watch the WWE wrestling. Now, I actually quite like wrestling. Watching it, I mean. So I was so excited when we got the tickets, I told everyone that I would only go if we went in fancy dress.

I decided to rework an old favourite, so my character was Giant Mansacks. Seemed like such a good idea at the time, until my sister (who's been before) told me that NO ONE else dresses up and they all take it VERY seriously.

On the night, both me and my nephew Jake got dressed up and I was slightly worried that our irreverent costumes might annoy a few people... But I needn't have worried. Aside from a few embarrassed parents trying not to explain to their 6-year old children what 'mansacks' were, most people took it in good spirit. And the guest presenter was David Hasselhoff!

So, here are some choice photos of the night.

Button Injured in Horrific F1 Accident

A Joke for Geeks

Putting the 'Hard' into Aardvark.

Tory Story - I can do PR, me

Just found a tremendous website where you can make your own very airbrushed 'Dave' Conservative poster, thanks to Taf over at Very Poor. Click here to make your own or see what other people have done. In the meantime, here are my contributions:

When Myface goes wrong...

Kemp Site

Today is indeed a day of days. My artistic folding of Ross Kemp's face has been selected for the Kemp Folds website. Simply entitled 'Zippy', visit the website to have a look. Feel free to post a comment, saying how brilliant it is.

http://kempfolds.blogspot.com/